Wednesday, March 21, 2012

New Gig and Goodbye Boy...

Lomo Film::  Burger Bar :: Toronto

I started a new job on Monday.  Same company, different department.  I'm not excited about it to be honest & yet with the copious amounts of resumes I've sent out in this past couple of weeks has been painful, I keep hearing nothing.  But yet, I keep sending and hoping.
Now don't get me wrong, I am VERY thankful for the job I do have. (Especially in this economy as I know it's been very hard on everyone.)

I am scared of the job. I think that's part of the problem.  It's WAY out of my comfort zone.  But that's supposed to be a good thing in this big scary world. No?

In other news, BCBound is well....BC Bound.  Finally.  Sadly.  The entire ordeal makes me unsure of how to feel.  I'm obviously very happy for him.  He needed a big change and something to keep him financially secure.  This move will accomplish both for him.  As for me, I hope we stay in touch and manage to get back to a place that's not as busy, strained or fraught with uncertainty as to whether we can function as good friends...even if it is via text message and   We had been in a really great space for a while, flirty, fun and connecting...but something happened.  I can't even really pinpoint where we fell apart or what did it...or even if it did!  But the progression of a relationship/friendship definitely slowed down.  I have some thoughts, but nothing that makes much sense.

I'm conflicted because I really liked him...and things seemed very positive.  I've chased my fair share of men...and I know the best approach is to just let him go emotionally.  I'm trying, but it's hard.

But fear not!  Enter 'CuteDad' on the scene.  Now, CuteDad  has been around for a while.  He's divorced and has kids (well, duh).  I really like CuteDad.  He's fun and sweet and always very lovely.  We have always hinted around hanging out, but never made actual plans.  We are bordering on that now and it's kind of exciting. 

Even if nothing continues with CuteDad, it's nice to have male company sometimes.  I need that.  I had so hoped that BCBound would be that for me, but I think it maybe became too scary/serious for him.

I don't know.
I can't guess anymore...but the one thing is, I will definitely miss him.

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